Category Archives: Rules

The “L” word

There I was getting coffee, and the boss comes by and says “I love you.” Now I understand he doesn’t love me like that,( and he doesn’t drink coffee,) but I left him hanging, and just walked away.  It was an awkward moment and I’m trying to wrap my head around the logic without laughing my ass off.  Comparably it would be like saying ” I love you,” to your grocery store clerk or mailman.
I love lots of people, my children, my close friends, I feel I am very loving (at times- I’m not exactly a  lovefest.) But, the only ones who hear “I love you ,” on a regular basis are my kids. Back when I was drinking I said it a lot. “I love you man, let’s have another shot,” to a complete stranger-forgivable in those days.
Nowadays, saying “I love you,” is like ringing the death knoll. For instance, my last relationship we held off on saying the “L” word for at least 2 1/2 years.  Suddenly there it was- peppering most of our conversations and instead of showing each other that we truly cared about one another, we just zipped out a quick “I love you, gotta go…” and from there, downhill very quickly, three months, DOA.

So – am I getting fired?  Probably right after I post this blog, but that’s only if someone reads it. In any case, I see myself as a guinea pig for a new management style- tell your employees that you love them- Fail.  The next day I am at the coffee station, boss comes by and says, “I am very fond of you.”

I yell after him , “Oh very fond of you, I love working here!” so loudly people all over the kitchen stare.  I hear someone say “ass-kisser.”  I don’t care.  I consider that slate wiped clean.  Awkwardness gone, all is well with the world.
So when is it appropriate to say the “L” word?
1. When you are burying anyone’s pet.
2. To your family and best friend that knows you wet
the bed until you were eleven.
3. To your spouse, if you still feel that way, not because you didn’t put away the groceries.
4. When someone brings you coffee in bed.

5.  When it looks like someone needs to hear it.
Perhaps that may have been going through this person’s mind, when they gave me the shout out and I left them hanging like a piece of garlic on the windowsill. In that event, thank you and I appreciate your generosity with the “L” word.  I apologize for not saying it back and I have run through various things I could have done or said and still have been sincere.  “Me too!  Thank you! Right back at ya!”  Hindsight is 20/20 for a reason.

My name is kstormy and if you’re  reading this blog, I like you a real lot.

Last Leg of Summer

Right at the end of a beautiful summer in Montana, my daughter broke her leg.  She hovered in the air for about 2 seconds I gather , and fell off a friend’s skateboard while I was at work.  I got the call from my neighbor that afternoon, which had me concerned because we have that dialogue now, after many trial runs.

Phone Rules while I am at work:

1. Call to ask if you can go anywhere outside the neighborhood.

2. Don’t call to tell me you are bored.

3.  Please do not have me pick you up acting like Scarlett O ‘Hara

on her last carrot in the potato field and then be jumping on the couch 15 minutes later.

4. Call if you are bleeding .

5. Don’t call because you can’t find the remote.

So I finished up my tables and went home to see her laid out on the couch and I knew right away something was very wrong with her leg.

We got in the car hopping clumsily and with a lot of pain.  It was hot and I had to pick  her sister up at daycare.

“Mom, ” Please don’t take forever at Jane’s ,” her brown eyes pleaded with me over her tear-streaked face.

“I won’t,” I said with great fervor. Then I went into Jane’s house and had a ten-minute conversation with her about which hospital to go to.

It was August 25th, my brother Jeff’s birthday.  When Jeff was eight or nine, he ran into a clothesline pole at the end of a grassy hill.  It was the only thing standing in the middle of the yard and he broke his femur.  Due to the randomness of this event and Jeff’s reliance on high drama at this age, we didn’t take him to the hospital immediately.  Actually, I believe I got a bad perm that same day. Jeff spent the whole summer in a body cast. Now, he repairs power lines in extreme storms – climbing 70 feet in the air in hurricane winds. Go figure.

I patted myself on the back for having the sense to change out of the all black waitress uniform I wear during the day. No, I am not complaining, I have a great job where I look over  the  river all day long.  The nearest thing to a life or death decision is what type of salad dressing to serve and I have benefits. I am thankful especially as I watch these bills drift in. Oh am I ever grateful.

Jesse was fitted with an air-cast walking boot because she had a spiral fracture near her growth plate.  They fitted her with crutches and I admit my first thought as I watched her lurch down the hallway was, “We ‘ll be back.” I chased that out of my mind and concentrated on the new reality that things were going to be very different this school year.